another roller coaster day . . .

things have been pretty up & down for awhile but yesterday was particularly so. being up so early and getting some exercise started the day off well but by mid-afternoon i was fading and frustrated with some work and personal stuff. then i received a call that got me all amped up again but i still had a low-level of sadness all day. had a few errands to run after work and then had plans to meet up with sweets & fifer around 7. ended up having an impromptu dinner of corn dogs & tater tots at the florida room with sarah and had a good time catching up. got the call from sweets that we were meeting at lucky's at 8ish so i headed there after dinner. was great to see those guys and hang out on the patio on a great portland evening. was a great evening and i didn't smoke at all despite being around smokers all night. wasn't even craving it. but . . .

on my way home, i cracked ... i admit it, i had a smoke. felt pretty bummed with myself. starting over again today. i can do this. i can do this. i can do this.